Nose Down, Eyes Up

By Merrill Markoe



Dog lovers are a breed of their own and I am not afraid to admit I am one of them. Therefore, it is always great fun to find a cute book about a dog; thanks to Merrill Markoe, one more has been added to that list.

Gil is a man in his late-forties who has been through a divorce, has been cursed with a dysfunctional family and earns enough to stay alive by living in homes of the wealthy while he does odd-jobs and construction to the home. His girlfriend, Sara, of five years, "speaks" with animals and adds three dogs to the list of one that already lives with him. He loves all of them but his favorite is definitely Jimmy. Jimmy was a gift from his ex-wife and was the very best thing that ever came of the marriage.

Suddenly one day, Gil is able to understand Jimmy, as well as every other dog he meets. He is amazed at the intelligence dogs have and their ability to reason and manipulate situations. Together Gil and Jimmy start a blog written in Jimmy's voice, hoping to capitalize on it by selling t-shirts with Jimmy's image on the front. Around the same time, Jimmy starts asking about his birth mother, insisting he meet her. Before long, Jimmy is snubbing Gil in favor of his biological family. All the while, Gil is breaking up with his wacky animal-communicator girlfriend, living in his ex-wife's guest house, being blackmailed by a private investigator and dealing with his mother's pressure to "bond" more with his doper brother. It's only when tragedy strikes that Gil and Jimmy are brought back together, their relationship even stronger than before.

Merrill Markoe writes in a breezy, easy-to-read style with a flare for pointing out the humor in both human and animal antics. I found myself laughing at least every two or three pages, mostly because there is such truth in the absurd when it comes to how people and animals behave. A scene at the beginning of the book has Jimmy addressing a posse of dogs from around the neighborhood; this is the first time Gil has heard them speak and he is standing silently out of their sight.

"Can I ask a question?" said Dink. "I know you've covered this before, but... tell me one more time: Is it pee inside, poo inside, eat and play outside? And what about puke? Is that inside or outside?"

"Here's a mnemonic device. Everything starting with p is outside. P is for 'patio.' P is for 'pool,' P is for 'plants.' P is for 'poo' and 'pee.' And 'puke.'"

"Are you sure?" said Dink. That doesn't sound right. If we were supposed to poo outside, why does Gil collect it in a bag and bring it inside?"

"Because Gil collects shit. No one knows why or what he does with it," said Jimmy. "From what I have observed, I think he maintains a pretty extensive collection and that's why he--"

"No. That is wrong. I don't collect it, I'm cleaning up the yard," I interrupted, unable to keep quiet any longer. Jimmy looked up, seeing me for the first time.

"Gil! Gil! Gil!! Hi, Gil! Hey! How are you! How ya been?" he said, trying to cover up the entire incident by running over to me and jumping around. "Hey, everybody! Gil's here. Isn't it great to see him?"

They all began to circle me enthusiastically, some of them hurling themselves into the air. "Oh, boy! Gil! Gil! Gil! It's so good to see you!"

"You look amazing! Let me smell you. Hey! You had chicken for lunch, didn't you? You got any more on you? Can I have some? Where you been all day!"

"That's enough, you guys," I said. "And just for the record, after I collect the shit in that bag, I throw it out. It goes into the garbage."

"All that work to throw it out? That makes no sense," said Jimmy. "Why?"

"It stinks and attracts flies," I explained patiently.

"Yes, I'm aware of that," Jimmy said, confused. "But you still haven't told us why you throw it out."

"Nose Down, Eyes Up" is an amusing, fast-paced book that any dog owner would be glad to read. Its wit and banter lighten the load of daily life, much the same as actually having a dog's tummy to scratch. It will be fun to see what Merrill Markoe comes up with next.